Where has all the energy gone?

I’m about at the point where I’m thinking it’s time to take a wire, put it into the positive and negative terminals in an outlet and stick the other thing up my ass to shock me into action.

Seriously.

I have not been writing, I have not been doing anything around the house, I just have been listless lately.

There’s winterizing of the house that needs to happen as well as cleaning. I want to sell things but e-Bay is looking like it’s changed a great deal and I’m not on any social media so Facebook marketplace is out. I really long for the good old days of the internet when you could go online and sell shit and the government wasn’t looking to dig into your pocket to get a cut or the deck wasn’t stacked against you as a seller.

I need to sell shit too so I have to find some outlet… a better outlet than the ones I’m familiar with.

I have kind of arrived at that point now where I look around I think of the Shelley poem, particularly the last few lines;

No thing beside remains. Round the decay
Of that colossal wreck, boundless and bare
The lone and level sands stretch far away. 

None of the things you value in your life will have any meaning once you are gone. They just won’t because while they are important to you, they are ONLY important to you so really they are nothing more than clutter.

My aunt passed away and my cousins just called got junk and threw everything away. It seems anathema to me, something that only an immigrant middle class would do. Who knows what was tossed. It’s been hard because on my end of the equation I have things from my paternal grandparents and the EYOC but who really cares about these things?

Certainly I wouldn’t think my cousins care all that much about what came before and the half sibling I have and her children likely don’t care much about these things either. Since I don’t have children of my own what are these things other than JUNK!

If I was to pass away tomorrow (and honestly who knows how long it would be before anyone realized I had passed) what would happen?

It would all get tossed. It would all be garbage. It’s really as simple as that.

You may think you’re important but the truth of it is unless you’re famous? Well, you’re not that important at all and what you leave behind doesn’t matter all that much unless there are descendants and people who can profit off the things you leave after you’re gone.